Hello, My name is Inez and I am a grammar idiot.
Seriously, how can a woman who is 6 credits shy of a triple bachelor’s degree be so freaking STUPID when it comes to grammar? I dunno but I am. English Literature, Communications and Advertising and I STILL AM A GRAMMAR IDIOT.
Case in point. I am thisclose to sending out queries for MONSTERLOVE. I posted my query for a friend to read and she found an error.
HER~~Should be ARE not IS.
ME~~Uhm, when I do that, MS Word gives me that green squiggle that is the bane of my existence.
So being the good friend she is, she hops to her trust red cellphone. and dials GRAMMAR NAZI!! *Super hero, big red cape, little bitty spandex shorts, Swasti-commas on his chest. Very cute, I hear*
Here is how it went down:
Always remember that MS Word is the reason that we now enjoy the abomination which is “reoccur,” when the proper term is “recur,” as in “recursive.” Remember that, and never trust Word’s judgment over your own.
The proper usage here is that which you were initially prone to use. The “are” refers to the plural “layers” – “there is more layers” is obviously wrong and fails the de-apostrophization test you can use to check for proper contraction use.
Once more GRAMMAR NAZI has saved the day. And while cleverly disguised as a techno-geek, he seeks to rid the world of faulty computer language use instruction and does daily battle with the ignorant masses who persist in using phrases such as ain’t got me none, irregardless, and the ever annoying green squiggle. Together with his faithful sidekick Dangling Participle, the duo seek to make the word world a more uniform and informed place.
Don’t have a Grammar Nazi in your Rolodex? Gee, sucks to be you. Try this instead. I already ordered mine.
Oh, and the next Grammar Idiot meeting is Thursday in St. Doofus’ Church basement at 7PM. Bring cookies.